I became interested in art when I was around four years old. I was lucky enough to learn from a local artist and it quickly became a dream to be one. I was encouraged by my mother throughout my childhood. There was always an art area with unlimited access in our house. I never thought I’d be able to be successful financially doing art of any kind, but I have always been passionate about the craft. As an eighth grader, I submitted a painting to the Kentucky State Fair and won. My award was a scholarship to NASA for Space Camp. At the same time, my father lost his job, filed bankruptcy and we were forced to leave my hometown. I never got to take my trip to Space Camp. Life got in the way.
I took every art class available in High School. Frequently placed in art shows and competitions. I rebuilt my esteem and worked on my craft in a variety of mediums. I couldn’t get my hands into enough! I did calligraphy, drawing, painting and ceramics. I even printed my own graduation announcements, using The Kiss reproductive painting and an old printer press. This was when I wrote and illustrated my first children’s book, The Dragon in Jeremy’s Basement. I wanted to write and illustrate from my beach house when I grew up! I wasn’t able to graduate early, the school board changed the number of credits my senior year. Again, life changed course. The art teachers created projects for me to do and I spent nearly my entire senior year in the art department. At graduation, we had to move again. I went through a wild spell of rebellion and I had no knowledge of how to make art school or any college happen for me. No one in my family ever went to school. The part of my dream to live at the beach was a reality, but it wasn’t the time to pursue being a writer/illustrator.
When I was twenty-one, I had my first child. I put my dreams on hold again. Life kind of got in the way of my dreams, where I thought I would be. It was never the “right time”. As an adult, we learn to meet our responsibilities before we do frivolous things. My father was one to constantly be in competition with himself and money was the priority for him art was a frivolous thing in his opinion.
To attempt to make him proud, I worked and raised my children. Was unhappily married, soon divorced and a single mom of three. Working was a priority and necessary for survival. I am now happily married to a good man, who supports my dream of drawing and writing. I am at a different place in my life. I am allowed to take a breath and live my dream. It is time, for me to take this path. I am terrified. I am self conscious that I won’t be talented enough or successful financially. It is intimidating. However, I am willing to try with the support of a good man who, as a carpenter, appreciates what your hands can create. My goals are to fulfill my dream of being a true artist. Successful in my own skin, using my talents and cultivating my skill. My goals are to expand in print with my words, with my art and, simply, myself. I want to be as good at this as I can. I want the reality to be attainable. I want to make children smile, help them learn and expand their dreams. I want to help them realize it isn’t frivolous and to use your gifts before life gets in the way.
10/16/16
Descriptive
The wind whipped around my ankles and the sand stung my skin. I was so miserable without being able to come here the stinging sensation going on around my ankles in a whirlwind didn't faze me in the least. I had waited too long and ached to be back. It's like I couldn't run anymore, couldn't hide, couldn't bear to be away from it. I needed the beach like some people need to breathe, like lovers need to be in each others' arms. I needed the beach like some people need a drug or crave chocolates.
I need to know that I am small in a life that seems immensely full of big issues, strong pressures, huge problems and overwhelming stress. I need to sense, feel and see the powers that are stronger than I am. Sand being even smaller than I, but having the power of the wind behind it causing my ankles to sting as the grains of sand whipped across them.
I walked up the dock toward the ocean and in addition to the sand, now, I had sweet grasses, sharp as razors making it a bittersweet sensation by pulling my skirt and rustling like wheat in a field back home in Indiana. This was home to me now, and was at peace within myself now that I was close to my biggest reason for coming here. I longed to live by the water.
I could hear the waves crashing on the surf now. I could smell the salt water and almost taste it in my lips as I got closer to the crest of the dunes. I kicked off my shoes and ran. The urge had taken over my legs and I just tumbled out onto the island. My secret place, my hideaway, my haven, MY place and the waves slammed on the shore as I raced toward them.
Regardless of how cold the water was, regardless of the time of day, this was home to my heart. All my life I had grown up and wanted the comfort of this place to fill my heart with peace in some way and it had always done so for me. It hadn't failed me yet, today included.
It didn't matter where I resided, what "place" I was in my life. The beach and the ocean of Sullivan's Island, near station 19, would always be home for me and was the only constant I had ever had. Through deaths, births, and regular issues in my daily life, I could always come here. Sometimes it took months or days or weeks or many hours, but I could always come and just BE in the same spot. Now that I lived nearby, it took less effort in some ways and I ached for it.
I could put my feet in the water. I could simply sit on the side and breathe deep breaths until the tears came or stopped. I was smaller than the rest of the world here and it overwhelmed me instead of whatever was on my mind. I spread out my arms, I heard the seagulls, and I felt the water taste my toes and sighed. This is where I belonged today, and a part of me would for the rest of my life.
10/07/2008
I need to know that I am small in a life that seems immensely full of big issues, strong pressures, huge problems and overwhelming stress. I need to sense, feel and see the powers that are stronger than I am. Sand being even smaller than I, but having the power of the wind behind it causing my ankles to sting as the grains of sand whipped across them.
I walked up the dock toward the ocean and in addition to the sand, now, I had sweet grasses, sharp as razors making it a bittersweet sensation by pulling my skirt and rustling like wheat in a field back home in Indiana. This was home to me now, and was at peace within myself now that I was close to my biggest reason for coming here. I longed to live by the water.
I could hear the waves crashing on the surf now. I could smell the salt water and almost taste it in my lips as I got closer to the crest of the dunes. I kicked off my shoes and ran. The urge had taken over my legs and I just tumbled out onto the island. My secret place, my hideaway, my haven, MY place and the waves slammed on the shore as I raced toward them.
Regardless of how cold the water was, regardless of the time of day, this was home to my heart. All my life I had grown up and wanted the comfort of this place to fill my heart with peace in some way and it had always done so for me. It hadn't failed me yet, today included.
It didn't matter where I resided, what "place" I was in my life. The beach and the ocean of Sullivan's Island, near station 19, would always be home for me and was the only constant I had ever had. Through deaths, births, and regular issues in my daily life, I could always come here. Sometimes it took months or days or weeks or many hours, but I could always come and just BE in the same spot. Now that I lived nearby, it took less effort in some ways and I ached for it.
I could put my feet in the water. I could simply sit on the side and breathe deep breaths until the tears came or stopped. I was smaller than the rest of the world here and it overwhelmed me instead of whatever was on my mind. I spread out my arms, I heard the seagulls, and I felt the water taste my toes and sighed. This is where I belonged today, and a part of me would for the rest of my life.
10/07/2008
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